What I think of my classmates
Anna and I were talking about our lives at our respctive schools
We thrashed about our glory-hound principals
Insulted the shit out of the bogus rules ala Simon Cowell
Told each other which teachers we liked and which teacher we hate.
And of couse our classmates
So anyway, here is how I describe my classmates of 5sc1 class of 2007

Alexander Lee
He is the class clown
Coming up with jokes and stuff
A real funny guy but kinda annoying at times
Assistant Head Boy

Andrea Chin
She is a nice girl
Always there for her friends
kinda plus-sized but okay
My closest friend in class

Athena Chai
Kinda bitchy and sarcastic
Don't know her very well
Loves books

Bong Khoon Sheng
At 6"2. He is DAMN tall!
Not close to him but he 'humphs' a lot.
B-ball star

Brendan Goh
Top Model.
The sweet, sarcastic, over-dramatic not to mention irrational drama queen.
The male version of paris hilton
Net-addict
Hates rules, a total free spirit
Very liberal

Brigid Goh
A babe
Sarcastic
Sweet, nice but although we were classmates for 11 years
I don't get her.

Caroline Tan
Resembles my aunt
Pro chi
Again, not close

Catherine Yeo
Worst hair style i have ever seen in my life
That girl doesn't know the word fashion even if you spell it out
I know it from top to bottom
and I am a MAN!
Never tries to be glamorous

Chai Lee Chin
One of my pals
Very nice and her puns are damn funny!

Chai Mei Shan
She has the loudest hair-raising laughter
Although she is the disciplinary prefect
She acts like a child
Seriously!
She reminds me of Shannon, my bratty 9-year-old cousin

Chai Ming Bong
Dull looking guy
Loves chinese chess
Andrea's "husband"
Horrible Hair

Chien Joon Ching
Princess
Very spoiled and pampered
She seems like a good girl but she is actually a bad girl

Chieng Leong Yiew
The class monitor
Sweet guy
Very nice and the fairest of us all

Chin Hui Ting
Silent
Mean
Don't know her that well

Chin Ying Ying
In my world she never stands out
It seems as if she has never existed

Chua Kheng Yong
The typical wushu, chinese chess geek

Cyril Lee
He is my honey
Very sweet and real nice
We are great pals
Badminton enthusiast and chinese chess addict
Good body and looks good in glasses

Elton Jong
He is very loyal to his friends
He is also sarcastic

Eric Chong
The fucked-up bad boy who thinks he can get away with anything

Franco ak Joseph
He is a nice and athletic guy
real cute
Star athlete of the school
Sarcastic and playful

Hubert Chong
He is a mischevious little fucker
Kinda like darren
Pimples more his beauty
Although removing his over-pimpled face will do much.

Ivy Siew
Head girl
She looks beautiful at first
But if you take a closer look you will notice she has
HAIRY ARMS!!!
Does she shave?

Jamie Ding
Blog addict
Emotional
Self-centered
Moody
Bitchy

Jenny Chiew
Tacky, free-loading bitch
A bimbo who actually is a shark
One of the most uncivilsed woman i have ever seen

Jeremy Lim
Alex's wingman, sidekick, lackey
A little subtle but still like Alex
Sarcastic and funny
Metro

Josephine Lai
She is a year younger than us
Real smart
She somehow seems very busy

Kee Jia Jia
The girl who would choose books over life
Bookworm
Studiholic

Kee Jia Zhi
No relation to Jia jia
Very annoying and sarcastic
Entertains Mei Shan in some way
I dunno, told cha mei Shan's a freak!

Lisa Tan
Slouches a lot
Her tooth streches out
With a little surgery she could be a model

Luke Kenny ak Doring
Another one of Alex's lackeys
Funny and more towards physiacal comedy
Nice guy

Melissa Hui
Short
Not close to her

Michelle Lim
She is a nice girl
Assistant Head Girl
Mediocre and quiet
But she shocks the class with her laughs and shocked expressions

Michelle Chung
She is the assistant head girl
Church lover
Very strong in her beliefs
Has a cute temper

Ricky Yong
King of the chinese chess and Boys Brigade
The geekiest clubs in SMK Sungai Maong
Real Loser

Song Hui Sang
She is funny and has a great comical personality
She is like the female version of Alex
She is a nice person in general

Thien Yee Ying
I hate her because she hates me
Real Bitch
Best Pals with the Princess

Thung Senk Siang
Leader of the ass-kissing zombies (Head Prefect)
Total jerk
Very conservative
Very into Buddhism

Victor Lim
Senk Siang's sidekick
Fat, sweats a lot
Tries to put people down by being so damn cocky

Vincent Chung
Nice guy
Hate his hair
Chinese chess addict and wushu maniac

Wong Liang Jiun
Has split personalities
Some times he is very cheery
At times he is like a workaholic pregnant woman

Wong Xiang Lun
I appreciate his honesty
Talks crap at times
Game addict
Boys Brigade VP

A really erotic story
Now, you all know Aaron and I are close
REAL CLOSE
In fact we are so close that we are easily mistaken for a gay couple.
People were like " Are you guys gay?"
And we were like " Hell no"
of course, those of you that know me will know that
Aaron is gay
and I am recently bi.

So anyway, there was this one time in Paris
When Aaron told me about his sexuality.
before that i was a straight man till...
long story ok
lets continue.

We were in our lavish hotel in Paris called Hilton.
You may imagine that Paris is nice, beautiful, aromatic.
But you are wrong!
People here wear extremely heavy perfume
However not as worse as some teachers in SMK Sungai Maong.
The air was filled with different scents of Au De Toilette

So anyway,
We were in our hotel and was done bathing
Aaron too.
i was wearing my Candice Michelle styled bathrobe.
he was wearing in his very frenchy boxers
Damn sexy.
Sitting on the bed he called me
I was just done changing
So he said
"Brendan"
'Yeah?"
" I'm gay"
"Okay"
"And"
I waited
"I love you"
"WHAT?"
"I said I LOVE YOU"

Without further adue
He started pulling me towards him
He held my face and then he did the unthinkable
He kissed me
Using his lips and caressing mine,
I obliged
I kissed him back
Our tongues intertwined
Licking
We were touching and caressing
Holding each other so tightly that there was no space to breathe

We stripped each other off.
he performed oral sex on me
Licking, Kissing, Sucking
It was getting harder and i felt the pressure.
I moaned
After that, I grabbed him and thrusted his face to my pubic area
He sucked even harder

Next thing I knew, i was licking his ass
Burying my face in it
After that, I put my cock on his ass and rubbed around it
Finally, I let my cock go inside his ass
I was fucking him
At first it was slow
Soon it became very fast
We were moaning and groaning
Doin it doggy style
My ass was in him so deep that i think i can feel his prostate.

After that, I let go
He turned around at started sucking again
I moaned
and then, cum spurted out
It shoot his face
His face was very messily creamed
Cum was flowing down from his face
I licked it and kissed him
After that, I sucked him cock
He moaned
Groaned
And shoved his cock deep into my throat
Gagging me
In the end, he cummed on my face
And licked his cum off my face
We slept till the next morning

Thank God there was no photoshoot on that day
we were too tired to model, lol
Oh yeah, if you believed the story above, well
YOU ARE DAMN STUPID!
BECAUSE
THE STORY IS FAKE...


FOR NOW.

The Gay Barbie Song
Hey Garets!
Hey Raul!
Wanna go for a ride?
On what?
On this! (showing ur large cock)

Barbie is a bitch
She's such a witch
I really hate her
Why does Ken date her
Ken is such a man
I do all I can
Just to do him
We just wanna screw him
She is such a bitch that I wanna scratch her eyes out

I have dreams about Ken
Inside my den
And we hold
And we kiss like sweethearts
But that Barbie is a slut
With that cute little butt
And I guess Ken like boobs made of fake parts
And I cry everyday
Cause straight up! That bitch is in my way

ooo
Barbie is a bitch
She is such a witch
I really hate her
Why does Ken date her
Ken is such a man
I do all I can
Just to do him
We just wanna screw him

When I see her
I wanna beat her
ooo ooo ooo
I will punch
And will crunch her
Ohhh Oh yes

Hey Garets.
What now Raul?
Look who's over there
Well if it isn't Barbie without Ken and the stupid California dreaqmvan
hey Barbie its us come over here
Look
Come over here please
(begin punching and Kicking while screaming)
Take that you little
you hooker
you bitch
(beating stops)
lets go

What I did while the rest are at sports day.
While Jamie, Luke, Alex, LJ, LY and all of my other class mates were...
OBLITERATED
TORTURED
STRANDED
SUFFERED
SCREAMED
GROANED
MASSACRED
MURDERED
BLISTERED
SPLINTERED
SPRAINED
BROKEN
EXECUTED
BEHEADED
STUCKED
MOCKED
ABOMINATED
ABORTED
CRUSHED
WRECKED
BURNED
SMASHED
TWISTED
CONFUSED
DEHYDRATED
STARVED
ACIDIFIED
AFFECTED
AND...
I have ran out of vocab so lets continue
In the spotrs day,
Meanwhile...
I was lounging in front of the PC
Playing games
Eating corned Beef
Sleeping
Learned to drive
Played with my dogs
Listened to my iPod
Chatted on MSN
Danced
listened to my CDs
Sang
Read the dictionary
Read the INCREDIBLY THICK and I mean THICK book entitled 'The Constant Gardener'
Watched TV
Youtube
Killing my brothers
Jogged
screamed
Ran
Quarrelled
Dreamed
Text messaging
And
That's about it
Ahhh, peaceful and serene.

Haley was the one that tore me down apart.

I was sulking and cursing and pissing off for weeks when Katherine Mcphee was runner-up.

I was in the verge of suicide when Kellie Pickler was voted off

I was crying and jumping up and down like... me when Carrie Underwood won American Idol 4

I cried when Antonella Barba never made to the finals.

I cried when jasmine got kicked off at season 3.

32
That's the number of innocent people that got killed.
Final death toll maybe 33.
But the 33rd person was the killer who killed himself
Its sad really.
I was shocked and terrified.
I cried.
My mouth hung open literally.
The video showed me how sadistic people could be.
Makin all those arseholes that have tortured me are like nothin
Makin me think that I am actually the bigger threat.
It scares me.
The silent killer.
Would there be one in my own school?
I don't know
Obviously

Meet Ms. Tigra Nici!
Yeah, yeah its a she
becu it aint got P
noe wat i am sayin?

Like whatever
It seems that there r a couple of girls from 5 B (Bijak)
Bijak means smart, btw.
Have a little crush on me.
U noe
flirting
asking 2 be friends
ladiladiyada
callin my name when i am makin my way to da lab
when i cross their classroom
Honestly, i dun really noe they like me or not
but its good to have a little attention
but honestly, i dun really care
nor give a damn
my life has no space for love
at least miss leong will be proud of me
being a confirmed bachelor and all
my life is occupied by unnecessary things that are important
like school
tuition
xtra class
ladiladiyada.
neeways, gonna post now.

Unappreciated
That's what i am feeling now.
It sucks lah.
I mean, I don't need any extravagant thing like surprise party or anything.
Just say thanks and mean it.
Plus, a little gift is always nice, lol.
No, I am not begging okay.

There are a lot of people that unappreciate me.
I guess its not till I am gone or dead then they feel appreciated.
People are always taking me for granted.
Its so sickening.
Makes me wanna cry inside.

First on the list is my dad.
He always drags me along and torture me with his constant whinings about my mom being spendtrift, unscrupulous, bitchy and crazeh that I feel God damn tired of hearing it that I always stares into space when he nags.
I always help him out (by force)
He never says thank you.
When I do something wrong, he just blasted at me
After that he nags and nags and ... nags.
For example, I busted the comp.
Its busted for over a month
He still nags about it.
EVERY FREAKING 45 minutes he will nag.
If I don't help him and busy with my own work. (Homework)
The bastard will threaten me and nag and repeat everything I say.
God it pises me off.
If he weren't my dad, I will punch that figgin arsehole in the face.
Give him my grandma's clothes and walker
He will be qualified as a grandma.
He also quotes this everytime he compares us with other people
"Your mom and other moms are like heaven and earth. Her own chicken she does not want to feed but other people's chicken she feeds. She always care about her mother's side of the family, never about you." (On my mom about family)
"Your mom and other moms are like heaven and earth. Other moms always worry about their kids but your mom doesn't. She only cares about your mother's side of the family, never about you."
" Your mom and other moms are like heaven and earth. Other moms know how to save money. She spends the money I give her for facials and do the body. That's why she is always out of money. You give her 10,000, she finishes 10,000." (On my mom and finances)
"You and other children are like heaven and earth. People don't need tuition, you need tuition." (On me and my bros and tuition).
"You and other children are like heaven and earth. People's computer can last 10 years, why yours cannot?"
When he refers to other moms, he means his own mom. When he refers to other children, he means him and his siblings.
A total momma's boy.
My mom always says that he goes to my grandma's place just to suck her boobs.
I totally agree.
Its not literal, its figurative.
He goea there and talk about all this crap to his mom and my grandma always agrees.
Apparnently, someone fails at parenting.

Next is about my classmates.
I always try to be helpful and be there for people and they always diss me.
I feel lonely at times.
Sometimes, I try cutting myself but a few real ones are there.
Besides, no use killing myself becuase of these losers.
You know what the problem is, I am too damn nice.
From form 1 till now.
People keep on calling me akua, pondan, penisless and all those transgender and homosexual insults.
Firstly, I did not offend them in any way.
When I first step in SMK Sungai Maong, they started calling me names already.
I cried, got bullied and stuff but still stand strong
I have never got into the seriously angry till I kill everyone zone.
I don't know if I was scard or anything.
Maybe because I just wanna be there and study and nothing else.
It even spread to the younger forms.
Soon, those 2009 graduates started using the same names
Even people in my bro's class.
The funny thing is I help them
Alex who created the song about me, needs me to help him in Leo and out of Mr.Thien's fire.
he still disses me at times.
Jeremy leaves the drama script to me and ran away to sports
I did the whole fucking drama script
Mdm Pearl says that these guys have no right to say things to me.
I agree but I was nice about it.
Adam, ask me to help him to refill his drink
I could turn away.
But I oblige
Next day, he threw an empty correction tape at me.
People keep on hurting me because they think its fun.
they like to see me cry.
Malicious sadist.
Not forgeting a few fuckers at ITC who did the same thing.

It sucks really.
My life is a wreck and I know it.
I wish somebody can help me
But I could not find one.
Its time for me to cry now.