Some jokes

I am bored and too lazy to create a tag, do a tag and tag people. So read some jokes from me, which are gathered and compiled from various unnamed sources or originally created by me?

Joke 1
Why did the one handed man cross the street?
To go to the secondhand shop

Joke 2
Gentleman, I have some good news and one bad news when you are looking for a wife

Good news
There is a girl who cooks great food

There is a girl who is silent and continues to love you unconditionally

There is a girl who never gossips or talks on phones with her friends till 5 a.m. in the morning

There is a girl who is there for loving you and not loving your money

There is a girl who is not a bitch

There is a girl who is low maintenance

There is a girl who looks hot with a T-shirt and a make up

There is a girl who would never make you scared or worry whenever she goes shopping

Bad News

There is no such girl with all the qualities above.

Joke 3
A man never worries about the future until he takes a wife

A woman always worries about her future until she takes a husband

A man is successful if he is more successful than his wife

A woman is successful when she can find that man

Joke 4
One day, a nun wanted to test 3 sisters on the art of sin, so she locked them in a room each with a hot sexy man in there. As she passed the first two rooms, she can hear groans, moans and orgasm but as she passed the third room, it was silent So the next day, the nun asked

Nun: It was so silent in there, I thought you should be screaming in there.

Girl: I know but my mother thought me not to talk with my mouth full

Joke 5
Kissing leads to humping like farting leads to pooping

Joke 6
I hate Asian Men, they are clean, butt loud and *tut* making gesture that an Asian man's penis is short

Joke 7
Your momma so fat, that people hired her to be a trampoline for children