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Friday, December 28, 2007

So what if I am going to spend 10 weeks in prison?
It would be just a while (I hope)
Hopefully, it won't last for centuries
I know that normal teens like you and me have perished there.
Well, lets see.
There is a boy who died after a rat pooped in his food
A girl who died of menopause-like syndrome
Another boy who was suffering from varuious injuries and was neglected and given paracetamol who died in the end
A series of drowning cases
One or two guys who got beaten to death.
Hmm, hope there are no deaths this year
Its been five years and the death toll is quite high.
There should be no deaths this year
Or else, I strongly suggest that the programme is to be shut down.
its not safe
Us teens have a life for God sakes!
I promise you that I will write a journal and then put it into a blog.
Telling you my accounts and exposed the truth
Government media is controlled, never believe what they say.
Except when its about international issues.
Well, I have list of what I want to do after my stint in prison.
Its somewhere at the side.
Brendzblog on hiatus
Its just seems that time passes by when you are having fun
While time sits still when you are not.
That just sucks
Obviously I dunno what to do.
Gonna go to that stupid brainwashing camp
for 10 fucking weeks
I dunno what to do though
But it gives me time to write my books
Just so you know as a humanitarian and a good samaritan
I am going to create a new blog
To show how suckish let others know about my experiences there
To let them know that they are doomed what are they gonna experience there in detail
To tell them what to bring for there safety and survival for their convenience and needs
To let them know that all the trainers there are homosexual perverts everything is okay and they are safe.
To reassure them that they will be brainwashed into over patriotic terrorists fine
Oh well, see you in Chinese New Year
will definitely be blogging
Haha, and don't forget my pressies
My birthday is on march 5th
I am gonna organize a party soon
Till then, goodbye
To all my readers, I love you all.
Even though that approximately half of you are gay.
xoxoxoxo Brendan Goh

Tuesday, December 25, 2007

Nobody Cares
I am angry, sad, depressed and frustrated
Nobody wants to go out iwth ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Sigh, I wanna cry
feel so sad
Nobody wants to go to Fever with me
Nobody wants to go out with me period
I feel soooooo sad
Dunno what to do
Even if I am gone for 10 weeks, still nobody cares!!!!
I hate EVERYBODY right now!

Monday, December 24, 2007

Oh my God
Oh my God
Oh my fucking God
God, God, God, God, God!!!!

Don't believe me?
Here is the exclusive from E!

On December 18, 2007, it was announced in an article in OK! Magazine that 16-year old Jamie Lynn was 12 weeks pregnant.[4]
She and her mother spoke to the magazine in an exclusive interview. Nickelodeon, the network that carries Spears' series Zoey 101, issued the following statement shortly after the announcement:[5][6][7][8]
"We respect Jamie-Lynn's decision to take responsibility in this sensitive and personal situation. We know this is a very difficult time for her and her family, and our primary concern right now is for Jamie Lynn's well being."
The father is said to be Casey Aldridge, 19 at the time of conception,
[9] whom she met through church.[4] Spears stated shortly before Thanksgiving that she had no steady boyfriend.[10] Because Spears was legally still a minor, and the three-year age difference, Aldridge could be charged with statutory rape, but prosecutors may be unlikely to do so.[11][12]

What the fuck?

Sunday, December 23, 2007

KUCHING: Top model, celebrity blogger and aspiring singer, Brendan Goh was arrested for drinking and driving on March this year. Just wee moments after celebrating his sexy seventeen. He was arrested at the Hui sing roundabiut after being suspected of driving under the influence. He is then booked and joined the ranks of his other galpals, most notably Paris Hilton, Nicole Richie and Lindsay Lohan. However, Goh is not the only celebrity to wear orange this year as former childstars, Macaulay Culkin and Haley Joel Osment suffered the same fate as the trouble star. Other than that, Kiefer Sutherland, star of the hit show, 24 is also facing the same charges as Goh although they are two seperate cases. Earlier in March, Brendan was sentenced to 3 months in prison but he was released just 45 minutes in. And now, the judge now orders him to finish his sentence which was cut till 10 weeks due to the appeal of his loyal fans.
What I want for christmas...
Christmas is coming in like 2 days!!!
well, of course I have been nice this year!!!
I always am and always will be.
But of course I am a little naughty, haha.
Today was a real cool day!!!
Dogs as in STRAY dogs!
Or ones that I didn't rear actually came to me
and ask for food from me
like I am a saint or sumthin, haha
well, i always give stray animals food at food centres.
They are sooo adorable!!!
Even though some are like breaten into crap.
Which is a very bad thing!!!
Animals should be treated nicely.
We are after all sharing planet earth with different species.

So this list is about things that I wished to happen
and I hope that you will help me make these wishes come true
1. That stray dogs and cats can be adopted and put into nice homes instead of the SSPCA
(We are not responisible for their sexual activities but at least give their kids a home. After all, life is precious. No matter how small. Unless they are bugs of course.)
2. This year will be an eco-friendly christmas. Buy things that are eco-friendly and biodegradable or reuse old stuff.
3. Britney Spears will be respected again. She has been trying real hard to get her life back on track so help her and support her.

Now here are the things I want for christmas
1. I want Paris Hilton for Men, been craving it since last year!!!!
2. Britney's blackout album.
3. Charmed book entitled 'Phoebe Who'
4. Charmed book entitled 'Light of the world'
5. Cecelia Ahern's 'A place called here'
6. I saw a lot of nice clothes at Boulevard, care to buy a black shirt for me??
7. A Nokia N73 or that Nokia slide phone.
8. A Hawkgirl action figure!!!!
9. Tickets to watch WWE RAW, Smackdown and ECW!!!
10. Well, buy an airline ticket and reunite me with my beloved.

Haha, merry christmas.
But I don't celebrate Christmas.
I celebrate the Winter Solstice which is lame
But I celebrate Hannukah!!!
Hannukah is celebrated for ten days
And you will recieve a present, everyday for ten days!!!
That's why i only have 10 things on my list, XD

Saturday, December 22, 2007

On this 150th episode of Brendzblog, which is also very, very special to me, I would like to announce that I am officially taken and unavailable.
I am so GODDAMN happy that I don't know what to do.

Friday, December 21, 2007

OMG!!! Christmas is coming soon!!!
And I haven't started shopping!!!!!
Die mian mian!!!!
Nothing to blog, life is so boring
I think that this blog needs a long term hiatus
1. My life is soooo boring
2. I am lazy to blog
3. I wanna finish writing my book
I am gonna miss you Brendzblog.

Wednesday, December 19, 2007

I feel closer to strangers than my own classmates
A couple of my pals took me out A LOT these days
I just went out last night and got my first bottle
OF BEER!!!!!!!!!!
It tasted weird at first but its good.
Although my mom was PISSED
(the fact that my friends drank beer and not knowing that I drank beer)

I went out with a couple of good friends of tuition that I haven't seen in AGES!!
And they introduced me to a few of their own
Which results in me having a party almost every week
and going out almost every night.
But don't worry, the latest was before 1030
which was last night, lol
Last night I had a lot of fun
Although someparts of me are a little sore
due to mutiple pats on the back.
These days, I try to spend as much time out of the house as possible.
Cause there is nothing to do but beating my record of 1594 kills
with Ma Chao on Dynasty Warriors 5: Extreme Legends
Gotta say that is boring.

I am still wondering when would DC release the toy version of Hawkgirl
I know that I am very very old for that
but I am not playing with it.
I am keeping it as a remembrance of sorts
Maybe I should buy a Power Ranger since they have been in a large part of my life.
but that is just stupid, really.

Btw, I do feel closer to my new friends than to my classmates
For some reason, I just do
We told each other secrets that we never told anyone before
Maybe that's because we may never see each other in person again
and we don't know if people we know, knew about that particular person.
When I saw the pic of our class on jamie's blog.
It occured to me.
nothing but a CHARADE
A mere PLAY that was put on stage
Nothing but a SHAM
They may feel close to each other
but I know that I will always felt left out, no matter what.
But thnking about it,
I know they will be there for me
Andrea, Luke, Jeremy
God, I miss them sooooo much!!!
I may not be in their lives anymore
but I know that a thing called im will link us together

Sunday, December 16, 2007

I am still alive
Back from Kuala Lumpur!!!!
Bought lots of stuff
Neeways, too tired to blog
I do have a few pics though
Nothing interesting in KL
In general,
it was, bad and stressful
Aren't vacations supposed to make you relax?
I think I can relax more when I was preparing for SPM.

Tuesday, December 11, 2007

You know that I am bored
So that's why I am blogging again
I am off for KL soon
I am obviously sick and tired of it
But I will be back on sunday
So its about 5 days of hell
I don't like my nation's capital

First of all,
its too HOT!!!
God! Last time I was there
I suffered so much heat that I feel sick
I vomited

Nextly is the people
They are very rude
I don't understand Cantonesse okay
I don't even watch your stupid Cantonesse soaps
that are scripted horribly
and not to mention bad acting
and predictable scenes

Plus, there is also a lot of crime around
People literally have to put backpacks on their bellys

Then, there were of course accidents
More specifically motorcycle and cars
Last time I was there,
I saw a dead body, lying on the ground!

But not all of Kuala Lumpur is bad
There are gonna be great bargains there!!!
So my cash is fully loaded and ready to be spent
There are gonna be soooooooooooo many choices there
If you were to go to KL
and see a guy with his hands full of shopping bags,
that'll be me.
I wanna buy some clothes
Maybe not those raunchy T-shirts
Its a fashion fau-paux according to Glamour Magazine.
Jeans are also fine, I want some black ones though
I definitely will get a black shirt
I don't have any of those
Preferably long-sleeved.
More pinks into my wardrobe?
Sorry, i think two is enough.
I would find more blacks as the celcom T-shirt is the only 1 I have.
Beiges and browns are out, too many
Whites are also a no-no
Maybe blue or purple.
Greens are a yes
As for jeans, more black too

Oh my God, there is also accesories!!!!
I want something like Jeremy's
The ones that look like a ring
and maybe even the ones that are large like Khoon Sheng
Or a graphic stud
Never ever choose those large round and flat black ones
too UGLY!!!!!!!!!!
I may even choose a bracelet or two

Next is CANDY!!!!!!!!!
I can't remember which supermarket but it has a LARGE variety of CANDY!!!!!!
I wanna buy all
10 bucks is enough, i think.
Ohhh, I can't wait to get some candy and gorge on them myself!!!!

Also on my list is CHOCOLATES
I want to have some nice yummy chocolates in my tummy
Maybe a bar or two
A few Snickers, Mars, Milky Way or Bounty might be in store
To keep that energy going.
I am in a shopping marathon.

I would also want to buy a perfume or cologne
I want to smell extremely revitalising
So that I might attract a few girls to sniff my scent
and let them follow me like a bunch of dogs looking at a nice piece of steak
Well, lets hope its girls and not guys, lmao!
But then again, maybe a few men won't be so bad

Of course DVDs are in my list
I wanna buy Ugly Betty!
I missed a lot and i wanna watch
I hope it will be cheaper too though

Scoop is nice but i wanna check out other flavours too.
I want some blue ice cream, if they have any
Lets hope my greedy mom won't try to steal a bite
I am gonna defend myself by making her guilty in gaining weight.

Come on, you think that I am THAT selfish?
I will definitely buy something for you
Just holla me and I will do it!
But you gotta get the gifts yourselves though
Unless you are going to Xiang Lun's birthday party on the 17th.
Of course if i still have money left after my shopping marathon.

Monday, December 10, 2007

Check List for KL
1. Ipod
2. Cell phone
3. Cash
4. Clothes
5. Shoes
6. Cell phone charger
7. Tolietries
8. Multiple groans of dread

Hope that I can find some decent earrings overthere

Friday, December 07, 2007

Going to hellhole
Hey, guys!
I am leaving for KL for about a week
but don't worry
I will be back in time for Xiang Lun's birthday party though

Honestly, I don't like KL
In fact, I don't like it period
The weather there is hot
The people there are rude as they'll run you over
Obviously, 1 would be spending 24/7 with my parents, Darren and Ryan
Pure torture
My last trip was horrible enough and I have to go through another trip?
Boy, I think I am gonna get sick again
Don't feel like blogging anymore
Just wanna do something so that I am stuck here
but what to do
Tickets are booked and I am on my way
This is not what I intend to do for my holidays.

Tuesday, December 04, 2007

If 5sc1 are characters of dynasty warriors
Then I would totally kick ass!
I am a major dynasty warriors fan
Just the feeling of hacking and slashing makes me feel so good
In fact it is second to only Smackdown vs Raw
when it comes to my fav

Before I begin
(to bide time for me to rack my brain)
I am gonna tell you my Top 10 favorite games of al time.
1. Smackdown vs Raw series
2. Dynasty Warriors series
3. Soulcaliber series
4. Final Fantasy series
5. Mortal Kombat series
6. Sims 2 series
7. Samurai Warriors series
8. Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas
9. Red Alert series
10. Pokemon series

So lets start with Liang Yew,
He would probably be Zhuge Liang
because he is smart and wise
and like his nickname which is 'Sleeping Dragon'
we know that he shines without the need of a voice
Like Zhuge Liang, he is very calm.

If Liang Yew were to be Zhuge Liang
then Liang Jiun would be Sima Yi
Although the relationship between Liang Yew and Liang Jiun and Zhuge Liang and Sima Yi
are COMPLETE opposites, however Liang Jiun matches with Sima Yi
Okay, Liang Jiun may be not as slim nor as cunning as Sima Yi
but he does have the sarcasm and the competitiveness.

My dear sweet Cyril will be the ever humble and practical Liu Bei
Cyril and Liu Bei are all very humble and have great noble values.
And I definitely know that Cyril is also very diplomatic.

Andrea will be Yue Ying
Like Andrea, Yue Ying has better wits than beauty.
Although Andrea and yue Ying sizes are like a ball and a piece of stick
Their knowledge and wisdom are matched equally.

Da Qiao is an over-dramatic girl who worries to much that she may have died of ulcers
She is also very cautious and careful like Michelle Lim
Although Michelle Lim is not as beautiful as Da Qiao
Their personalities are similar.

Zhou Tai would be Khoon Sheng
They are both tall and equally strong
They also have pretty few words to say compared to others.

Zhen Ji would be ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I know is embarassing cause I am similar to a girl or more precisely an Empress.
Just like me, you would first find her pompous and arrogant.
But once you get to know her,
You would know that she cares, a lot!

So who is my husband, Cao Pi?
Well, he has to be power hungry (like that narrows down the list)
cocky and soft spoken but sarcastic
I think it would be Elton.
I know, eww
eww, eww, eww.
I am gonna have nightmares for sure.

Alexander would be Sun Ce
He is very energetic and wild
He is a little wreckless and crazeh
but when you see him and Nina, you know there is a soft spot.

Jeremy would be Zhou Yu
Like Zhou Yu, he is calm and collected
He also is very sensitive although rarely shows it.
Like Zhou Yu, he is a sweet guy.

What about Zhou Yu's wife, Xiao Qiao?
The person has to be very reckless but cute at the same time.
And acts like a little girl.
Jamie? Okay, I guess its Jamie then.

Xing Cai is cool but fierce
There is no doubt in my mind it would be Athena

Diao Chan would be Joon Ching
They are both beautiful and loyal

Bad ass Lu Bu would be Bad Ass Eric
They are both fierce and strong
Lu Bu also has a soft side
You can see it when he is with Diao Chan
Like Eric and Jenny.

Yuan Shao is a very pompous 'big bomb'
So that would be Xiang Lun

Victor maybe pompous and arrogant
but he is actually nothing but a slob and greedy pig
Dong Zhuo would be suitable for him.

Yee Ying is passionate and willing to stand for the things she believes in,
so I would have to say that
She deserves the role of Ma Chao
They are equally firece and their stand on their beliefs are the same.

Zhang Fei always brings in the fun
So that would be Luke.
So lets party!

Senk Siang would be a great Guan Yu
He is very strong and powerful
Plus he is also known as the God of War, you see his statue in Buddhist temples
Senk Siang is perfect for that.

Huang Zhong is an old man
but he still got a few good juices left within him
Just like Jia Zhi.

Well, out of juice
Can't compare anymore.
Blog more soon.

Monday, December 03, 2007

What do I think of my classmates

Okay, okay

Its been done before

One of my old post yeah yeah yeah

But its a mere description of my classmates as you can see

Now, as the not-so part of the century approaches,

I have decided to leave the past behind by

blogging what I REALLY FEEL about my classmates

The good and The bad

Alexander Lee

The Good

He is the life and soul of the party

He is entertaining

He is nice, fun and great

He is pretty much your all american boy with problems

that he disapppears from school almost everyday at the end of the year.

The Bad

He is real LAZY

He also have a little hint of a sinister darkside in him

It never revealed itself

But I think its there or I might be delusional

Andrea Chin

The Good

She is very nice and will always try to be your friend

She is helpful and a good confidante

Her heart is pure

In fact so pure that i would nominate her to sit beside God.

The Bad

She gets psyched out very easily

Her knees were shaking literally and it was just a few weeks before spm

Another thing is that she is too holy

Being holy is a good thing

but being too holy is what restricts you from things that you should try.

Like that 14 year old kid who is a believer of Jehovah Witness

He died of leukemia as he refuses a blood transfusion

Saying, that his blood will be tainted.

I dunno about him or you guys

but in my opinion he should go for it.

Life is very precious as you only lived once

Its very Harry Potter, pure bloods and Mudbloods.

Athena Chai

The Good

She is caring I guess

She is also very honest and true

The Bad

She knows how to be subtle with comments but still make sure you feel it


I would pity the guy who ever marries her.

Bong Khoon Sheng

The good

He is TALL

Mr Kennedy tall about 6 foot 2

He has soft heart despite his lanky image

with his hand that's full of veins due to B-ball

The Bad

He 'humphs' a lot

Dunno him that well though

When it comes to bad

I only know his good side

Brendan Goh

The Good

He is nice, sweet and funny

Very sociable and cares a lot

Great with sarcastic quotes

Even if you are his enemy

he will help you if you are in great desperation

He gives great advice and has an intersting philosophy to life

The Bad

He has a very hard outer shell

You would have to crack hard to get his good side

He is very dramatic

Get ready for mood swings and loud 'Oh My Gods'

Although he can be very nice, he can also be very fierce.

He is also a little bit like a jerk

Very, very arrogant.

Brigid Goh

The Good

She is a sweet girl

She loves to give girls hugs and show her affection

Among the girls, she is actually one of the few who actually has a personality

She is also very open

The Bad

She might be a little arrogant at first

But like Brendan, you gotta crack it real hard

Caroline Tan

The Good

She is a sweet girl

Very trendy

And close to her friends

She is also very beautiful

The Bad

Although she has the beauty factor,

her personality doesn't match that
She fades in the background
Fails to gather attention or doesn't want attention.
I dunno

Chai Mei Shan
The Good
She is a very nice and sweet girl
She is very hardworking, always had a thick stack of books by her side
She has quite a bright personality
And is also very wise.

The Bad
She has a dual personality
One is her quiet self that will growl at you if you make too much noise
The other is this wild, crazy, carefree type
Who is as loony as a moon.
You would know when she's haviong her period
Sadly, its the quiet one that happens when she has her period.
It might associate with oestrogen I think.
I will definitely pity her and will try to stay away from her
when she reaches menopause.

Chai Ming Bong
The Good
He is a nice, sweet and humble guy
That's about it

The Bad
He has this high fashion Saleisha mushroom head hair cut
(I am trying to be nice okay)
He is lame and looks dumb
But he is actually smart

Chien Joon Ching
The Good
She is a nice and sweet girl
A little princess
Dare I say it,
The most beautiful and hottest girl in class
Unlike Caroline, she has personality

The Bad
She is a little spoilt
(Duh, she is a princess)

Well, that's the first ten the others are coming soon.
Just so you know, I don't care

I read a few comments on my blog

and I didn't realized that

But anyway thanks for your comments

Even when they are actually untrue, rude and insulting

Thanks for your love.

I am sure some of you can't stand me

Wishing the Samoan Bulldozer, Umaga bulldozed the shit out of me.

But hey, there is never such thing as bad publicity.

And I am sure that I won't be like Britney Spears

with paparazzi swarming at her like bees and then breakdown in front of a restaurant

or attacking a car with an umbrella

or running over someone's foot

or taking the turn off the red light

and of course,

shaving my head bald.

I would embrace it until everyone got so tired of me.

Come on, you know the word 'shame' is never in my volcabulary

I say what I want

That's the freedom of speech.

I cleared my room today,

got rid of the textbooks and stuff

I kept a few like my Biology Bible.

As a momento.

Honestly, I was shocked to see the HUGE stacks of paper piling up.

I was like did I study ALL of that?

My mom even joked that I should have more

I could only do my sarcastic jokes and said

'You must have so little when you are in high school'

that's why you are soooo jealous.

When the room was cleared with the textbooks, reference books and exercise books

I felt a sudden rush of ecstacy
The room felt
so empty
so clear
so free
The new Chi was very inviting
and I embrace it with my arms
My room felt so fresh.
As soon as the rain stops falling,
and the ground is dry,
The ceremony will begin
To signify the end of a part of my history
And the beginning of a new one.

Saturday, December 01, 2007

My dearest cousin Derick celebrated his sexy 17 at his home.
It was a nice normal party with mixtures of relatives and friends.
Very nice and I showed them something very rebelious.
Here's a hint,
It is the leading symbol of a person who has wild side.
I think its very cool

Anyway, the food was great
Though I do wonder where the food came from
And why parents never threw a sweet 16 as cool as that for me.
In case you are wondering,
I am a little envious.
But, its Derrick's night
So I try not to act so diva-ish.

Derricks friends were like the normal Malaysian style friends
Acting like rowdy brutes and all
Not the kind that I have with my closest friends
We always talked to each other and yes we do joke
But the guys were never like Derricks' guys
Even the Straight ones.

Like my uncle Ah Jiu's wedding
The friends did this little intervention and jeering tactic
They cornered him and tease him
I think they are preety much fair-weathers.
I could only watch Derrick with pity and help the others.

However, this was not why I was offended
Derrick is fine
Don't need protecting
It happened quite early in the party
It was hard keeping my usual straight face all night
I felt so offended that I wanna smack that face over those 'creative' people.
Because it was just between me and Derrick not his other friends.
So why does it have to do with them?

I was talking to Derrick with my usual American tone of English
Its how I normally speak
You know what the other guy beside Derrick thinks
He says that why your cousin's english is so deep?
Actual meaning: Why your cousin thinks he is a cocky American asshole.
I mean I really took that I can never fit in with them
Because of the extremely great difference.
But that guy has that tone that its soft but you can actually hear it
Because he wants you to hear it.
It's just me
This is me naturally and fuck yeah I am not going to change this quality.
I know that the guy maybe jealous or something
but puh-leeze
Over something as minute as that
I didn't know that the guy can't understand english
Its not my fault that he is one of those btc pro-chi guys

Although, yes I did hang out with Derrick and his gang
Just to listen how they jeered him like a bunch of idiots with raging alcohol.
It was fun and Derrick did not seem angry
But at least my family left early
Cause I felt real awkward.

Another thing that pisses me off is couples whispering nothings to each other at someone's B-day party
Seriously, don't do that in public.
Its makes people uncomfortable and single people lonely
I have to give props to Anna and Lawrence on Cecelia's birthday a few days ago.
Not once that they did those stupid couple things.
It's someone's party and is thier time to shine
Not you and your spouses TomKat-ish romance.

I really don't get Derrick's friends
They prefer to hang outside the house.
In front of the street
Maybe that's where most of them belong
Instead of the yard
I dunno, Darren's friends are also like that
I am making mental notes of what to do on my next party.
To help to spice up being the David Tutera clone according to Brigid and Jeremy

Well, if you are planning a party,
here are a few tips.
1. Never ever allow your brother to invite his friends to YOUR PARTY!!!
First of all, is your night and your party
Do not allow your brothers to chip in to the guest list.
I did it under much parental control and looked what's happened

2. Never ever simply invite other people
Invite the people you really wanted to invite
Never invite other people just because they asked
I did and my party got screwed.

3. Seperate friends and family
Party for family means for family
Party for friends mean for friends
Never ever mix.
Your family will be watching stupid chinese soaps all night
While your friends are left at the streets.

4. If you have a very weird mom, by all means GET RID OF HER.
I think my mom has Ausberger syndrome
A mild form of autism
Heather from ANTM cycle 9 has it
My mom acted real weird over there
She actually tried to flirt with one of Derrick's friends
Plus she is Goddamn nosy and a total embarassment.

How can you achieve these four simple tips?
Well, for number 1.
Put your foot down!
No means no
Cancel the party if you have to
Your pride means everything.

Number 2
Make it exclusive
The person invited must feel special
That way, if more people asked?
Just blow them off.

Number 3
Have seperate parties.

Number 4
Send her as far away as you can
Keep her busy.